Insufferable
by m r s . w r i t i n g
Summary: Bella's sick and when ever Bella's sick, she actually has a sense of humor, probably to the point where she's insufferable... “Do me a favor Emmet and go out back and get a really big rock, will you?”“I’m here. What do you want with it?” "Take a hit a me.


_Insufferable _

"Edward, why are you bringing me here?" I asked in a whine, through my stuffy nose and with a voice that I barely had anymore. "I don't wanna be here…" All I wanted was to be home, in my bed, wearing nothing but sweats, my lap top, with a sprite, and IM all day. IM and watch Noggin. That's basically what I did when I was sick. I watched cartoons and talked to strangers on the internet. Edward thought it was ridiculous. And I loved Edward. But when I'm sick, I could care less about the world around me. I was a smartass, constantly making rude remarks when I'm sick. So, Edward had had his fair share of laughs and awkward moments with me today.

"Alice is cleaning your house, especially your bed sheets, and as soon as she's finished, you can go home."

I stopped. "Alice is _cleaning_?" I went, clearly surprised. Alice never cleaned. She never did laundry. She usually wore something and then threw it out. But either way, I was here, at the Cullen Household, where I didn't want to be. _Bed, bed, bed, bed_… I kept chanting in my head.

"Yes, surprisingly," I could see he thought the same as I.

"Bella! How are you feeling?" I turned to see Emmet standing in the middle of the Cullen's living room.

"Do me a favor Emmet and go out back and get a really big rock, will you?"

"Why?" he asked, clearly confused.

"Please just do it."

I caught a glimpse of Edward, who was looking at me like I was crazy. I just looked away and collapsed onto the couch. I laid down, with a loud groan. "Kill me now," I whispered to myself. Edward hated when I made cracks like this, but I felt like hell, and I couldn't care less. If he wanted to take care of me when I was sick, then he'd have to put up with me. I was perfectly capable of taking Tylenol and getting in the bed. I can microwave chicken noodle soup! I had this handled perfectly… But no! The Cullen Brigade had to come and try to take care of Bella! God, vampires visit Forks, they try to save the day. Werewolves visit Forks, they try to save the day! Alice's credit card limit goes out; they try to save the day! Bella gets Bronchitis…..they try to save the day.

"You know Edward, you're just gonna have to clean your house when I leave…"

"Well actually…." He began.

"Oh yeah," I groaned to myself. "Vampires are immune to germs….Lucky…"

He laughed. "You'll feel better soon."

"Okay!" Emmet jumped up in front of the couch, and surprisingly, he actually had a fairly sized rock in his hand. "I'm here. What do you want with it?"

"Emmet, you didn't seriously get Bella a rock?" Edward said, a look of utter amusement on his face.

I interrupted Emmet's response by getting up and standing in front of him. I stood in front of him, my legs spread apart, as if getting ready for heavy impact. "Take a hit at me." I stated.

"What?!" he exclaimed.

"Just…" I motioned toward my face, "smack dab in the middle of my face! Send me to the other side of the house!" I motioned behind me.

"No, Bella, I'm not hitting you with a boulder…" he said.

"You're right," I concluded, "its not big enough. In fact just, forget the rock and just hurl Jasper at me."

I heard a loud thud and I turned to see Jasper, an uncomfortable look on his face, his hands empty and a rather dead book on the floor. He had apparently dropped his book. "No, no one is hurling anyone or anything at you Bella," Edward stated. "Besides, Carlisle's home, and he's gonna want to know how you are."

A few moments later, Carlisle made his way into the living room. Dropping his briefcase, he casually made his way toward me. At least he wasn't trying to wait on me hand and foot. "So," he stated, feeling my forehead. Why he did that, I didn't know. His hands were so cold. Edward actually felt colder than usual, which was why I actually wouldn't let him in my room. I loved him, but I hated the world when I was sick. Especially when it wouldn't let me rest. "How was your appointment with Dr. Brobst?"

"It still wasn't you," I replied smartly.

He scoffed. "I don't know why you didn't want me to perform your check up, Bella." His perfect lips turned into an amused smile.

"Well," I began, after he took his hand away, "I knew since I was congested and my throat hurt that you would have to take samples from the back of my throat. I don't know about you, but I think it's weird having my boyfriend's father stick long objects in my mouth. Also, it just adds to the weird consider I have very severe gag reflexes…"

He laughed. Emmet let out a laugh while Jasper tried to contain one. Edward on the other hand, I swear if he were human he'd be blood red.

"Well there goes next Saturday," Emmet joked.

"Not funny," I laughed, my voice straining.

"I can prescribe you something for you throat if Dr. Brobst hasn't," Carlisle informed.

"I don't want you sticking anything down my throat, let alone telling me what I can swallow," I turned away ignoring the look of discomfort on Edward's face.

"We should get Bella sick more often," Emmet declared.

"No!" Edward jumped.

"God, Edward, is your pride suffering?" Jasper laughed.

"No, Bella doesn't want to get sick," I said in third person. "Bella wants to get better so she doesn't have to be watched hour after hour…"

"But what did Dr. Brobst say?" Carlisle asked.

I let out a small cough and said, "I have bronchitis, strep throat, and my sinuses are acting up…"

"And…"

"If I'm not better in a day or two to go back, because this could turn into pneumonia…"

"Well, are you sure you don't want me to prescribe you anything?"

"Don-"

Edward saw through me, knowing I was about to make a perverted joke. "No, Carlisle, Dr. Brobst prescribed us some medicine…"

Carlisle looked a little forlorn. "Are you sure?"

"What's wrong Carlisle?" I giggled, despite the pain it sent into my throat.

"I didn't to write any prescriptions today…" he looked away, getting up and walking away from me.

I sighed. "Well, you could prescribe me something for numbness…"

"Oooh, what's wrong?" he replied slightly excited.

I never saw Carlisle excited… He reminded me of a giggly teenage girl. Apparently Alice had forced him into too many father-daughter days. "Well, for some reason," I began, "I can't feel my toes… Or my butt now that I think about it…" my brows furrowed at the very odd and disturbing fact….

"That's why you were acting odd Saturday night!" Edward exclaimed.

His exclamation attracted eyes and I felt rather odd at the fact that my boyfriend had just proclaimed that I hadn't noticed his move making due to my coming down with a cold. "Well, I know not to ever try to seduce Bella when she's sick," Emmet stated sarcastically. Edward cast him an angry stare.


End file.
